lucky koala

now that's what you call a lucky koala. it would be a completely different story if that same koala were in a bushfire in malaysia. the reason is simple. if a malaysian fire-fighter found a koala in one of our jungles, i don't think he would give it a drink.

he would make some KOALA PANGGANG.

sometimes, i truly wish i could write like this

yet another instance of someone attempting to rewrite the english language. my favourite lines and phrases include:

1. "In the morning, are letter you said won a lot of pimples."

2. "Fistly, your don't pop your pimples. It is because the pimples is pop."

3. "Thirdly, your said won received a lof of pimples."

and the bestest line?

"Lastly, your pop the pimples is have a balance diet."

pure poetry. maybe in a few years this would be included in the literature component of spm. i mean, how many marks would you give if you were me?

when i grow up, i want to modify my car like this

add a fluorescent tube and a black, "just-been-run over" racing stripe:

change to not only bigger, but "taller" tyres:


come to think of it, it's really quite amazing what some people would spend their money on.

The Man Who Was Lying By The Roadside

When I was on my way home from work this afternoon, I saw a man lying by the roadside. Curiosity got the better of me so I pulled over, stopped the engine and stepped out of the car. As I walked towards the man, he was still lying.

"THE SKY IS GREEN!"

It was absolutely mind-goggling.

"THE EARTH IS TRIANGULAR!"

Ever since the day I began my career as a tutor, I have come across this enigmatic character countless times.

The man who was lying by the roadside.

Sometimes he appears in a student's essay, but more often, he appears in reference books. Hence I have spent many sleepless nights wondering what it would be like to meet this "man who was lying by the roadside" face-to-face. And so this afternoon, there I was, with the man who was lying beside the roadside standing right in front of me. He was ranting on and on.

"MALES GIVE BIRTH TO BABIES!"

I wanted to get a word in, so I shouted at him.

"Hey, what's up with you man?"

Instead of dignifying my question, he continued lying.

"THE MALAYSIAN EDUCATION SYSTEM ROCKS!"

"MALAYSIA HAS THE CHEAPEST PRICES FOR IMPORTED CARS!"

"THE ROADS ON MALAYSIAN ROADS ARE THE BEST IN THE WORLD!"

I tried my best to maintain my composure, but I couldn't. As I pushed the key into the ignition, I burst into tears and sped away, leaving the man who was lying by the roadside in a cloud of dust. I mean, how could he be such a bloody liar?

Somebody Loves Amber and It Isn't Me